Bumper Cars

I remember coming off, my heart racing, doing everything I could to hold back the tears.   I declared very loudly to my Mom that I did not want to do that again. The seat belt burn still stinging across my neck.

I love roller coasters, I love pirate ships, and I really love the tea cups, but I'd be just as happy to never ride the bumper cars again. So what's the difference?

Control. 

Control is the difference. When the roller coaster starts I know where I'm headed, up and then down, around, maybe even upside down, depending on the type of snake it is. The pirate ship swings back and forth with a predictability governed by gravity. What goes up must come down. And the tea cups, they just spin and spin and spin until my head feels dizzy, like it did when I was two and a half feet tall, twirling with my eyes to the sky.

The bumper cars are a different story. Once that electric floor is turned on, the wheel is mine and I'm supposed to steer. I make choices about how this ride works. I can take this car wherever I want. Sounds exhilarating, and it is.  For that one brief second before everyone else starts moving. I may only get four or five feet before I'm faced head on with that kid, squinting and smiling his devious smile. He's ready to take me out. I brace myself and speed up, ready for what I know will happen. When WHAM out of nowhere, I'm sideswiped.

This was the cry of my sister's heart recently. "I'm just so tired of being sideswiped."

If you've lived on this planet you know what she means. At some point in time we've all been sideswiped, probably more than once. One of mine came when my husband came home early, not because the boss gave him a few hours off, but because he gave him a pink slip instead. Maybe your sideswipe came from the mouth of a doctor who used words like malignant or inoperable. Or from the sight of men in uniform not yours approaching your door. Or a betrayal by the one person you trusted the most. The list is too long and too hurtful.

Sideswiped.

The numbing pain comes sudden, it takes your breath away and leaves you with little sense of your bearings. Why? Why did God make us ride the bumper cars? Why is there a current that seems to pulse through life leading only to chaos, sideswipes and pain?

Back to the garden we go. You see, from what I know of my Savior, I don't believe God made the bumper cars. Sure He holds the key to the switchboard and can turn them off at anytime. Thankfully, out of His goodness and love, He gives me more time.

No, in the beginning, I think God created the Merry Go Round. The horses spun safely and steadily around their center. The lights shone bright, and the music was in perfect harmony. This sweet ride was what God intended. But in walked temptation. The allure to try something new, a different ride. One that offered its riders control.

As much as I want to blame Eve, I know given the choice I would have chosen the same.

Control. 

I know because it's what I'm choosing everyday, when I grumble about not being where I want to be, when I complain because my children don't sleep when I want them to, or when I fly off the handle and let my angry thoughts pile up until they spew nasty and hurtful words. I want it the way I want it. I want control.

Sadly Eve's and my desire for control has turned the Merry Go Round into the bumper cars. Those graceful and steady horses are now a bunch of old and stinky, rubber scuffed cars. Deceived. Believing they'll have control of their ride, and it'll be fun. The bumps and bruises are just to be expected. They keep jerking back and forth around the metal cage, targets waiting to be sideswiped.

This is depressing news. Isn't this blog supposed to be happy? Forgive me for crashing the Bumper Car party, but experiencing, admitting and understanding the hopeless dirty vessel I'm in is crucial if I ever want to find my way back to the peaceful Merry Go Round.

The good news? Life isn't the bumper cars forever. Thanks be to Jesus, there's a Merry Go Round awaiting us. Wondering how to get there? It's not as hard as one might think. Meet the conductor of the carnival, hear the story of how He sent His one and only son to walk onto the electric floor, to be bruised by the collisions of our sins, in order to make a way off this wretched ride. Then get out of your stinky car and follow Him off.  Let him lead you to the Merry Go Round.

I can't promise you won't be sideswiped as you escape. In fact you may even be more vulnerable to oncoming cars. But the Rescuer is good, He grabs your hand tight, and He gives you a helper who provides protective gear to armor up with as you make your exit.

For me, it's worth the climb out of the car. I'm still training my eyes on my rescuer so I don't lose sight of Him in the chaos. Forever following Him until we arrive together at the Merry Go Round where I can breathe in steady rhythm, hear the music from the angels and bask in the light that shines from His face turned toward me.

Thankful for the promise of the Merry Go Round, where I'll never be sideswiped again.

Truth~

Genesis 3:6
When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate it. She also gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it.


2 Corinthians 11:3
But I am afraid that just as Eve was deceived by the serpent's cunning, your minds may somehow be led astray from your sincere and pure devotion to Christ.


John 14:6
Jesus answered, "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me."

Hebrews 12:2
fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.

Revelation 21:4-5
'He will wipe every tear from their eyes.  There will be no more death' or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away." He who was seated on the throne said, "I am making everything new!"